[Sonic arrives back at Mario's office and Mario is cross.]
Mario: Hey, I told you to take out those Double Dragon banana heads! What's the matter with you?!
Sonic: I know. I fucked up… [Sonic grabs the dead Bub, drops Bub on the floor.] …but I did murder those two guys from Bubble Bobble, so…
Mario: What the fuck is a Bubble Bobble?! I didn't tell you to do that! Look, normally I'd put a Bullet Bill in your skull by now, but I'm gonna give you one more shot.
Sonic: Oh, good, 'cause I ordered a bunch of shit from Amazon and sent it here. Are you doing anything today? Because I'm gonna need someone to sign for it.
[Mario facepalms himself.]
Mario: There's a little frog that's backin' up traffic and delaying my shipments of drugs to the Underworld. I want that green fucker's head on a stake. You understand?
Sonic: Ah! The old murder and stake! No sweat.
Mario: And to make 100% sure that you don't screw this one up, I'm sending someone along to keep an eye on you, which of course is a figure of speech, because he's not a cyclops.
[Luigi shows up.]
Luigi: Hey Sonic, you know you're like my partner in crime over here!
Sonic: Alright, let's go Luigi… Ferigno? Nah, that's no good, I'll keep thinking.
[Sonic and Luigi leave.]
Mario: What? Mario doesn't get a nickname this week? Fine, I'll do it myself. Mario… uh… Hey Mario… uh… hmm. It's harder than it seems.
[Cuts to Sonic and Luigi on a city with Frogger on the sidewalk.]
Sonic: You like causing traffic jams, huh, Kermit?! You better believe it ain't easy being green!
Luigi: Hey, Sonic, you think this is one of those, uh, hippy psychadelic frogs or what?
Sonic: Uh, look, Luigi normally I'd be first in line to trip frog balls but uh, I'm trying to take this job seriously.
Luigi: Fuck it! I'm lickin' this bitch!
[Luigi licks Frogger and gets wide-eyed.]
Sonic: Whoa! Are you alright?
Luigi: Oh my god! This is some big shit over here! I feel so significant you know. I-I love everything! I even love my brother, despite like being a spotlight hoggin' fame whore. I'm on top of the world, Sonic! I'm on top of the—
[Luigi gets run over by a bus.]
Frogger: You're fucked.