(Sonic arrrives back at Mario's office and Mario is cross)

Mario: Hey, I told you to take out those Double Dragon banana heads! What's the matter with you?!

Sonic: I know. I fucked up.

(Sonic grabs the dead Bub, drops Bub on the floor)

Sonic: But I did murder those two guys from Bubble Bobble, so....

Mario: What the fuck is a Bubble Bobble?! I didn't tell you to do that! Look, normally I'd put a Bullet Bill in your skull by now, but I'm gonna give you another shot.

Sonic : Oh, good, 'cuz I ordered a bunch of shit from Amazon and sent it here. Are you doing anything today? Because I'm gonna need someone to sign for it.

(Mario facepalms himself)

Mario : There's a little frog that's backin' up traffic and delaying my shipments of drugs to the Underworld. I want that green fucker's head on a stake. You understand?

Sonic : Ah! The old murder and stake! No sweat.

Mario : And to make 100% sure that you don't screw this one up, I'm sending someone along to keep an eye on you, which of course is a figure of speech, because he's not a cyclops.

(Luigi shows up)

Luigi: Hey Sonic, you know you're like my partner in crime over here!

Sonic : Alright, let's go Luigi...Ferigno? Nah that's no good, I'll keep thinking.

(Luigi and Sonic leave)

Mario : What? Mario doesn't get a nickname this week? Fine, I'll do it myself. Mario...uh......Hey Mario... uh...........hmm. It's harder than it seems.

Sonic : You like causing traffic jams, huh, Kermit?! You better believe it ain't easy being green!

Luigi : Hey, Sonic, you think this is one of those, uh, hippy psychadelic frogs or what?

Sonic : Uh, look, Luigi normally I'd be first in line to trip frog balls but uh, I'm trying to take this job seriously.

Luigi : Fuck it! I'm lickin' this bitch!

(Luigi licks Frogger and get's wide-eyed)

Sonic : Whoa! Are you alright?

Luigi : Oh my god! This is some big shit over here! I feel so significant you know. I-I love everything! I even love my brother, despite like being a spotlight hoggin' fame whore. I'm on top of the world, Sonic! I'm on top of the-

(Luigi gets run over by a bus)

Frogger: You're fucked.

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